‘The Honeymoon’ is a phrase that’s used a lot when it comes to the strong feelings in the early days of romantic relationships. In fact, you might have felt ‘the spark’ in the beginning of your relationship, and as a result, the early days were very exciting for you and your partner.

However, like every other flame, ‘the spark’ needs to be kept alive by both partners. Keeping the bond that you first felt with each other alive takes intention, particularly in face of the pressures of work, kids, extended family responsibilities, etc. which can be very consuming. Daily routines and the stress of everyday living makes it almost impossible to sustain high levels of intimacy without effort. It takes practice, time and effort to keep intimacy levels high in any relationship.

Here are 5 ways to strengthen the intimacy in your relationship,

1. Do exciting things together– As your relationship develops, you are bound to form a routine. However, routines become boring. Shake things up by making an effort to do really exciting things together, such as preparing a delicious meal together, going on a walk, taking a special class together or play a board game! It will provide a much-needed breath of fresh air in your relationship and help you discover new things about each other.

2. Have deep meaningful conversations– Talk about your relationship, your current lives, plans for the future and your emotional state. Try as much as possible to be vulnerable with your partner and let them see the real you. Lack of communication and bottling up negative emotions can lead to resentment. Explore the things that make your relationship work, and strengthen your commitment to each other. Having a therapist facilitate these conversations can make them really fruitful and rewarding.

3. Be thoughtful – Intimacy isn’t always about the grand gestures. Something as simple as writing your partner a love letter or stocking up on their favorite snack can make them feel incredibly loved and appreciated.

4. Make couple time- It can be really hard to focus on one thing in today’s digital world, and sometimes we unconsciously pay more attention to our gadgets than to our lovers. At least once a week, turn off all electronic devices and take time to enjoy each other in a physical way. Having a strong emotional bond enhances your physical connection and maintaining a physical connection is positive for your emotional bond.

5. Express gratitude- Express gratitude for one thing your partner did during the day, no matter how small or random.This will help them feel loved and appreciated. There are so many tasks to do in life that go unnoticed but that take effort commitment to maintain. Make sure to appreciate what your partner is doing for you.

If you would like to improve intimacy in your relationship and strengthen the bond between you and your partner, please book a relationship therapy session with Deborah. She helps couples to improve the connection and communication in their relationships.